Okay first of all you guys know that I'm not a weight-loss or exercise guru or professional. I am just a girl who is tired of being fat. I'm tired of having to squeeze into my fat pants and pull them up so I don't have a muffin top. I'm tired of not being able to go into any damn store I want to buy clothes.
I am 6'1 so I will always have to buy "longs" but dang it I want to be a size 10/12 again like I was in high school. I have big hips. When I was
anorexic skinny in high school I was still a size 10/12 and a size medium/large... I would be OVER THE MOON to be back in size 12's... right now I'm a 14/16... Now that I've lost 9 pounds I'm a very comfortable 14. (Read: no muffin top)
I totally got off track.
I have been getting a lot of questions lately about "how do you have so much energy?", "where does your motivation come from?", "how do you find the time?"
First of all let me say that my life is pretty simple right now. My husband leaves for work at 7 each morning and is home by 5.
I am a stay-at-home-mom to an almost 3 year old, who other than the occasional gymnastics or other little "sport" I put her in, has no other outside-the-house activities.
I love my simple life.
I am not taking it for granted. I know that many of you would kill to have my life. I am extremely blessed. BUT I know that it won't always be this way. When Hazel starts school and sports and when we have another baby ('s)... my life won't be so simple. So I'm using this time to take care of MYSELF. I am being "selfish." (I put that in quotes because I don't think I'm being selfish AT. ALL. because I'm taking care of myself.)
BUT with all that being said... I have a daily struggle with "should I go to the gym today? or just stay home?"
Obviously, being lazy would be my first choice.
That's what got me here.
Every day I have to talk myself into it.
-I think about how much better I'll feel when I'm done and a sweaty mess.
-I think about my family. I want Hazel to have a happy and healthy mom. I don't want to constantly be battling with my weight all my life. I want to teach her that you can be healthy and active and HAPPY. I'm not ever going to beat myself up over eating a brownie. I want her to know that ALL things in moderation is a great way to live. I want her to be happy and healthy and active too. I want to be a good example so that she won't constantly be worried about her weight the way I have. I want her to know that it's okay to have a brownie or even 2... but eating 8 is not good. Even when I was
anorexic skinny in high school... I thought I was fat. I don't EVER want her to think she's fat. I want her to be comfortable in her own skin.
- I think about all of you. We are in this together. I have a goal weight and so do you. Mine is more than likely higher than yours but I'm way taller than you. I want to be HEALTHY... And I want to be able to maintain my weight without sacrificing for the rest of my life. But seriously, you guys are super motivating. Every time I post something about working out on instagram or my blog or MFP you guys are always there with encouraging words! It's incredible. THANK YOU.
-Me. I am tired of looking in the mirror and not liking what I see. I want to rock any outfit I choose. I want to look good naked and be confident in myself. I want people to look at me and say "I want to look like her." I want to motivate other moms to push themselves. Just because you're a mom doesn't mean you can't be a MILF. I want people to see me dripping of sweat at the gym (which happens every time I go) and push a little harder because of me.
- I am tired of saying "I quit" when someone asks me how my weight-loss is going. Like I said... this isn't my first rodeo. I have started and quit a dozen times. This time I am finishing. Something this time around clicked. I am done being fat. I am done starting over. I am done being unhappy. I am done with the excuses. The dirty dishes and house can wait. This is my time. I don't care how long it takes. I will never give up. I will reach my goal weight and I will finally take my "after" pictures... instead of only "before's"
What are somethings that motivate you?